Lies of Childhood
Resolving troubled beliefs about life and one’s own self should open the door to hope, promise and growth...so then, resolve this. For most of my life, I’ve had a feeling, a desire...that I wanted to become “real”.
““Real isn’t how you are made...it’s a thing that happens to you...said the Skin Horse.” “Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit. “Sometimes...Horse said.”“[1]
The ill-contrived notion, that if I’m loved enough, that this “real” will occur, has (mis)shapened my most valued relationships. In the giving, the never seeing, the always listening and forever trusting...I’ve done my best. But, the way “this” real feels...I just don’t want it anymore.
““The Rabbit sighed. He thought it would be a long time before this magic...happened to him. He longed to become Real, to know what it felt like...yet the idea of growing shabby...was...sad. He wished that he could become it without these uncomfortable things happening to him.””[2]
Becoming someone else’s notion of real, an actor and now impostor with decades of training for this rigorous charade, makes understanding self much more difficult. Learned tricks of distraction and diminished expectations support swift surrender: losing track and recognition of personal voice.
Why wasn’t the Velveteen Rabbit real enough on his own terms? A life well spent. I dare to say this is quite possibly the worst tale we could share with our youngest and most vulnerable; a twisted attempt to teach personal value and meaning by way of the seeking and the confiscation of another’s approval.
““When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.” said the Skin Horse””[3]
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